Often people around ask you what depression feels like. Depression is like a living thing that feeds on one’s darkest moods. The moods that always makes you think the worst. It yearns for solitude. In fact, it makes you crave for alone time. It ensures you don’t get time with anyone else except you and your extreme thoughts.
It challenges anyone or anything that can bring you respite. It includes people whom you love and mean the most in the world too. They could be reaching out to you with love and concern. But, you can’t reach back. You want to, but your arms won’t move.
In fact even the closest ones who know what you are going through wouldn’t understand your behaviors. That is when you want to give into all its whims and fancies. You put a fight against it that no one around you would notice. Not that they don’t want to but because you don’t show it. This fight against this monster goes on for months/years. Most of the days you delay it. Somedays you box it out of the park. Somedays it pummels you the ground. I have known a few who survived these wars. I have lost few friends to this war. I don’t know what’s my endgame?
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